Author by : Rexanne Mancini

As the holidays approach, I find myself wondering how I’m going to accomplish all I expect of myself. I expect to have perfect presents under the tree for an astounding number of people who will be visiting from out of town, besides the usual round of gifts for my children, immediate family, close friends and significant others, such as teachers, school staff, hair dressers, manicurist, etc. Added to the gift buying frenzy are countless trips to the grocery and food specialty stores for the feasts I expect to prepare, again for countless people I am expected to entertain during these holidays.

What’s one person to do when it becomes overwhelming and seems there’s never going to be enough time, resources or energy to cope? Well, I’m not sure I have the answer. What I’m longing to do is escape to an undisclosed location (me and Dick Cheney) to save my sanity, health and well-being. Naturally, this isn’t an option … I hold the holidays too dear and my daughters have come to expect huge fanfare on these special days. I have set up their expectations of me, just as I have set up the expectations of myself that I might not be able to pull off this year due to an unstable health condition and subsequent lack of mobility I’ve taken for granted in years past. Mostly, I just want to be able to get it all done, as I have every other year, which is no longer an option. I am left to ponder my upcoming fate with the dread of not performing or of falling short.

I suspect the “expectations” will somehow be met, only because I
couldn’t bear to let my children down during the most important season for meeting expectations. And I have set myself up for all of this, gladly, willingly, never expecting “ill health” to interfere with our rituals and festivities. Never mind that this health condition was caused primarily by trying to cram five weeks worth of expectations into a ten day period when I over-booked myself with work, volunteering at my children’s schools at the same time I was expected to take care of many other obligations and promises to family and friends. I think the lesson here is to relinquish the expectations of myself and scale down to a more manageable holiday routine, like it or not.

Alas, there will come a time when we parents are no longer able to perform the myriad duties and routines we’ve created for our families, for any number of reasons, and we will need to give up control of making sure everyone’s holiday expectations are met. This could come in the form of a health crisis, monetary crisis, time-crunch crisis … take your pick. This is the time to delegate the responsibility of the be-all, do-all parent and shift our focus to relishing time with family and friends more so than relishing the accomplishments of others and our own expectations of us.

We are in the midst of a joyous and sacred time of year when our hearts and minds should be filled with love and good will, not with a frenzy of get-it-done anxiety.

I wish you all a joyful, relaxed holiday season, filled with love and happiness. Give yourselves a break and allow one or more of the details to slip by or delegate if need be. Being there for your family in sound mind, body and spirit is ultimately more important.

I have found that doing my Christmas shopping online is a lifesaver and any other task I can accomplish online is equally gratifying. Find ways to make your life a little easier during the busy days ahead.

Copyright – 2004-2005 – Rexanne Mancini

Rexanne Mancini is the mother of two daughters, Justice and Liberty. She is a novelist, freelance writer and maintains an extensive yet informal parenting and family web site, Rexanne.com – http://www.rexanne.com -Visit her site for good advice, award-winning Internet holiday pages and some humor to help you cope. Subscribe to her free newsletter, Rexanne’s Web Review, for a monthly dose of Rexanne: http://www.rexanne.com/rwr-archives.html

[tags]holidays, expectations, frenzy, crazy, over-worked, time, accomplish, delegate, overwhelmed, shop,[/tags]

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Author by : Linda Salazar

As always, when this time of the year comes around, I am amazed at how fast another year has gone by. It’s also the time of year when I make an extra effort to be aware of the energy and attitude I am carrying with me as I am out and about doing everything I need to do to prepare for the holidays. By doing this, it helps keep my stress level down and makes each day flow more easily and effortlessly.

I invite you to do the same for yourself. Notice if there are any emotional patterns that show up for you at this time of the year that tend to create more stress in your life. Are you focusing on anticipating the worst with shopping, crowds, traffic, visits with relatives?

Whatever it may be for you give yourself a break by having a different outlook toward this holiday year than past. Take as many deep breaths as need be throughout each and every day and allow yourself to relax into all that you need to do and all that is happening around you. Know in your heart everything will get done that needs to get done and as you give up the urge to control the circumstances around you that you can’t control, the more you will see things getting done with ease. It’s an opportunity to practice your patience and willingness to go with the flow. Put a smile on your face even if you have to force it at first. A smile not only lifts you emotionally it effects everyone around you, ultimately effecting how things show up for you.

Instead of remembering all the times you’ve been with certain relatives that were less than joyful, create a new picture for yourself. Imagine spending a pleasant time with this person. Be open to the possibilities of it being different because you’re willing to be different. Remember, it starts with you. They are who they are and all you can control your own emotions.

Oh, I know, I know. I can hear you now. “But you don’t know my Uncle Horace, he makes the holidays miserable for everyone.” Uncle Horace may be the scrooge of the party but that doesn’t mean you have to fall prey to his energy and let it ruin your holiday. Again, you are always at choice and you get to manage your emotions as you choose. Not Uncle Horace! If need be, spend more time with those in the room you feel more joy toward and as you do this, it is not the time to talk about everything that’s wrong with Uncle Horace. But most importantly, start holding a different vision now for your upcoming visits.

Are you worried about not having enough money to buy the gifts you want to buy? Stop. Gifts are great but we all know a gift from the heart is not always about something expensive. The most wonderful gift I received last year was from a relative who spent $2.49 on me. He bought me a beautiful card and in it wrote all the things he appreciated about me. It touched me in a way that is hard to put into words. That gift was worth it’s weight in gold to me and a year later it still brings tears to my eyes when I think about it. Release yourself from the pressure of buying something more than you can afford and if you’re not able to let go of that ask yourself what’s really beneath that belief and be willing to take an action that starts busting through such a limiting belief.

So as you find yourself standing in long lines, dealing with crowded malls, sitting in traffic or anticipating being with certain relatives, do your best to hold an awareness of how you’re managing your energy and thoughts. If it’s not for your highest good take some deep breaths in and out holding a thought that feels a little bit better. Close your eyes and remember all you have to be grateful for and then smile.

I wish you a safe, relaxing and joyful holiday season. May the year ahead bring you much abundance and prosperity in every aspect of your life!

Copyright 2005, Linda Salazar all rights reserved. This article may be reproduced in its entirety as long as all credits are included.

Linda Salazar
Certified Personal Life Coach, Author, Speaker
310-375-4800
Awaken The Genie Within®
Practical Strategies for Magical Results
www.awakenthegeniewithin.com
Linda@awakenthegeniewithin.com

[tags]Law of Attraction,life abundance,prosperity,beliefs,self satisfaction,holiday purpose,holidays[/tags]

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